Preparing to Pause - Lessons Learned from 12 Years of Pausing
Why I Began My August Pause
Twelve years ago, I made a decision that would transform not only my work but my very relationship with rest and restoration. It was August 2013, and as a changemaker navigating the emotional demands of my work, I felt drained, restless, and unfulfilled. I had noticed that much of my client work tapered off in August, a natural lull I had ignored for years. This time, I decided to honor it.
I carved out 30 days for myself—a full month to step away from the constant cycle of productivity and to claim something my ancestors could only have dreamed of—permission to rest. I called it my "August Pause."
That first year was full of mixed emotions. I was excited by the prospect of prioritizing myself, yet terrified of what stepping away might mean—for my clients, my family, and even my identity. The guilt was unrelenting. Questions consumed me. Was I abandoning people? Was this selfish? But I also knew that I couldn’t continue on the way I had been without giving myself space to restore. Little did I know, this practice would grow into a sacred rhythm of my life—a ritual that I’d still honor 12 years later.
Through the years, I’ve learned invaluable lessons about how to Pause effectively and meaningfully. I want to share four of the biggest insights in the hopes that they inspire you to weave your own moments of restoration into a world that often forgets we’re human. it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference.
Lessons Learned About Pausing
Lesson 1: Give Yourself Permission to Pause
The hardest part of my first August Pause wasn’t stepping back—it was overcoming the guilt.
I felt torn. The thought of taking 30 days off felt indulgent. I thought of all the people and projects I was “letting down.” Yet beneath that guilt lay a deeper truth. What I really needed was permission—not from anyone else, but from myself. Permission to prioritize my well-being. Permission to acknowledge that my value doesn’t come from how much I produce or give.
The moment I granted myself that permission, everything shifted. I could finally begin to see restoration as a vital part of my life, not something I needed to earn or justify. And here’s the reality—it’s okay to pause. It’s okay to prioritize fun, passion, joy, and curiosity.
If you find yourself resisting the idea of taking a Pause, I encourage you to lean into this discomfort. Ask yourself, what’s behind it? And how might granting yourself permission to pause unlock new opportunities for growth and renewal?
Lesson 2: Breathe—Consciously and Intentionally
During that first Pause, I underestimated how anxious I’d feel about stepping away. I had thought pausing would feel freeing, yet I kept worrying about my responsibilities. What would happen in my absence? Would I be overwhelmed when I returned? Stomach knots and busy thoughts threatened to sabotage my rest.
That’s when I turned to my breath. I realized I couldn’t control what awaited me after my Pause, but I could control my presence in the moment. I practiced simple intentional breathing exercises, like taking a few deep breaths whenever I felt anxiety bubbling over. These small moments created a space of calm in my day and eventually helped me ease into a true state of restoration.
Whether your Pause is 5 minutes or 5 weeks, remember to include mindful breathing. It anchors you to the present and reminds you that renewal happens one moment at a time.
Lesson 3: Identify What You’re Pausing From
Pausing doesn’t have to mean a complete halt—it’s about choosing what to Pause. For me, August is about stepping away from my work as a healer and coach. I pause from being “on call” for others’ needs, so I can focus on my energy and desires instead. But the Pause is not about abandoning everything. Some activities, like journaling or spending time with close loved ones, remain part of my routine because they nourish me.
Get clear on what you’re pausing and why. Are you taking a break from work emails? Setting boundaries in a demanding relationship? Reducing commitments that constantly stretch you too thin? Define your Pause so you know where to focus your energy—and where to release it.
Lesson 4: Cheer for Yourself—Pausing Is Revolutionary
Our culture thrives on busyness. We are constantly told to do more, achieve more, and keep moving forward. Rest is seen as lazy or unproductive when, in reality, it’s the key to sustaining any kind of meaningful change.
Pausing—intentionally stepping away—isn’t just an act of self-care. It’s an act of defiance and liberation. It’s a way of reclaiming your time and your life in a world that doesn’t always value rest.
This is especially true for those of us working to dismantle systems of oppression. Pausing reminds us that our worth isn’t tied to our productivity. It brings us back to the present moment, offering clarity, resilience, and the energy to continue our work with focus and purpose.
Whenever you choose to Pause, know that you’re doing something remarkable. Celebrate it. Clap for yourself. Rest teaches us to value ourselves beyond what we can “do,” and that’s something worth cheering for.
Ways You Can Pause
Big or small, Pauses can take so many forms. Here are 20 ideas for incorporating restorative moments into your life:
Go on a nature walk.
Take a day off to read your favorite book.
Schedule a weekend staycation.
Meditate for 10 minutes each morning.
Try a new hobby just for fun—no pressure to excel.
Enjoy a slow, mindful meal.
Spend time journaling.
Take a nap without setting an alarm.
Turn off your phone for a few hours.
Go watch a sunrise or sunset.
Plant something in your garden or home.
Cook a meal with loved ones.
Watch old movies that bring you joy.
Practice yoga, tai chi, or any form of gentle movement.
Start a gratitude list and add to it daily.
Declutter a small area of your home or desk.
Dance to your favorite music.
Spend hours wandering a museum or art gallery.
Schedule time to do absolutely nothing.
Reflect on your goals, not to change them, but to honor them.
An Invitation to Pause
This August, as I step into my own restorative Pause, I invite you to explore what rest and restoration might look like in your life. Whether it’s an afternoon to yourself or a month-long break, give yourself the gift of stepping back. Permission, breathing, boundaries, and celebration—embrace them all. Pausing, after all, isn’t a luxury; it’s a necessity.
Remember, in the words of bell hooks, “Self-care is an act of liberation.” What will your first step toward liberation look like?
